The hardest battles are fought behind closed doors—where no one sees the tears.

When you’re raising children with special needs, the fight isn’t just hard—it’s relentless. My wife and I lived that reality for years. There were nights we sat in our bedroom, away from where the kids could see, crying quietly because we didn’t know if we could keep going. But we did.

We faced:

• Calls at work telling me to come immediately because my son had destroyed a classroom when his needs weren’t met.
• A system that didn’t understand simple compulsions—like needing to use the same door or stairwell every day.
• Police involvement when behaviors escalated, and the day I walked into a hospital to see my child handcuffed in the emergency room.
• Calls from Child Services because our daughter wouldn’t brush her hair—a call later deemed unwarranted, but still terrifying.

Every meeting felt like a battle. I had to sit across from school officials and demand answers, asking for their version of events and my child’s, then pointing out every failure. They claimed to use Non-Violent Crisis Intervention techniques—something I was a certified instructor in at the time. Yet, what I saw was restraint, fear, and misunderstanding.

We wrote letters to the Ministry of Education. No answers. We wrote to Premier Kathleen Wynne, who passed it to Mitzie Hunter, then Minister of Education. Again—silence. Every step felt like pushing against a wall.

The struggle for families of children with special needs is unyielding. It’s a grind that seems endless. But here’s what I can tell you: it does get better. Between the hurt and helplessness, there are smiles and moments of joy. Treasure those moments—they will carry you through the hardest days.

Today, both of our boys have graduated. One is exploring post-secondary education, the other preparing for a skilled trade. Our daughter is thriving in high school. It wasn’t easy. It took everything we had. But it was worth every tear, every meeting, every sleepless night.

To every parent and caregiver walking this road: don’t give up. Your fight matters. Your voice matters. And your child’s future is worth it.

#NeverGiveUp #SpecialNeedsAdvocacy #ParentLeadership #NorthStarPerspectives #InclusionMatters